How Kenyan Parents Are Raising Families Abroad
Tulix Team
“In some ways, I didn’t know I was Black until I came to the US… I had never worried about my Blackness or looked at my life through the lens of race”, says Faith Karimi, a senior writer at CNN Digital. This is the reality of so many Kenyans upon moving to the diaspora.
Kenyan parents living abroad, like many other migrants, also face an array of cultural differences. Faith adds, “Back in Kenya, challenging the opinion of someone older than you was considered disrespectful, something my husband and I had to unlearn after moving to the US. But our son has never lived in Kenya, so he does not share our cultural baggage and cannot relate to our lives before the US. He looks people straight in the eye and says no to us when he wants to.”
With a willingness to learn and some creativity, Kenyans abroad have been able to successfully raise their children in a foreign country while staying connected to their roots.
Finding Strength in Numbers
Moving to a new country comes with a lot of changes from the climate, language, food, transport systems, environs and even how you manage your money. Add on children who are going through a similar transition and it can get overwhelming. So where do you start? Anywhere that feels the most accessible for you.
Seek out other Kenyans living in your area on online forums where you can ask questions, learn from other people’s experiences and transition vetted online friendships into in-person support systems. This will help you manage your expectations and build resilience as you work towards stability.
Reasons for relocating and income levels vary between families so taking on odd jobs despite having academic qualifications may be a new norm. Connecting your children with other Kenyan children whose parents you trust can give them a sense of community as you adjust to working multiple jobs with possibly longer hours.
If you don’t speak the local language, consider taking a short course so you can have conversations with the locals as you navigate your new city. When Rachel Mwakazi first moved to Germany, learning German helped her feel more confident and adjust faster to her new environment.
And although you’re using a different currency, budgeting basics are applicable everywhere. Keep a list of grocery staples, recurrent utility bills and petty cash for impromptu needs. Be flexible and kind to yourself as you redefine your financial goals and figure out what items work for you and your family.
Learning as You Teach
Education creates future opportunities for children but navigating a new education system can be daunting at first so it’s important to do your research. Don’t be afraid of asking other parents within your community for advice and suggestions.
When you have the time, help your children with their studies and ask their teachers for extra support like tutoring for subjects they find challenging. You can also look into Individualized Education Plans (IEPs) if your child has special needs.
You can also equip your children with tools to adjust to culture shock as they settle into your new country. Create a welcoming environment so they can honestly and consistently share how they feel about the move. They may understand why you relocated but may miss their life and friends back home which makes it harder to adjust.
As you listen and validate their emotions, suggest trips to local museums and attending intercultural community events to trigger their curiosity and help them get familiar with your new area.
Keeping Your Own Culture Alive
Visiting Kenya to introduce children to extended family members is also a great way to teach them about their roots but it can be expensive for some parents. So bringing Kenya to your new home abroad might be easier and here are a few ways:
- Celebrate Kenyan holidays and festivals with your children explaining the significance of that special day.
- Send groceries to your family back home on Tulix and cook the same traditional Kenyan food together across time zones.
- Teach your children Swahili and your vernacular language so they can communicate freely with relatives back home.
- Decorate your home with Kenyan art.
- Listen and dance to Kenyan music.
Remember, you’re on a very unique journey so embrace your experiences knowing you’re not alone as other Kenyan parents like Faith are also figuring it out. With a little love and patience, you can create a nurturing environment where your children thrive while embracing their Kenyan roots.